I"m an idiot Current mood: pissed off So Friday we went to PA and had a wonderful visit with Lori. We went ahead and walked around the mall b/c that's fun and Tyler wasn't doing so hot all cooped up in the office areas. So we hit a few stores and I asked if we could hit Penny's b/c my mom had just told me they had infant Christmas dresses on sale for $14.99. So we went and it was the first store to have more than one choice for 6-9 month clothes that I've been to. We found the perfect dress, and decided to look for Tyler an outfit. We were choosing between two and picked a suit- pants, long sleeved button down shirt, vest and tie. All for $14.99. His has at least 5 times the fabric but at those prices I don't care- clothes are priced the way they are and who am I to question it? So we checked the size chart and figured 4T best for Tyler. He's a 5T hight and at the bottom of 4T weight. He's doomed to his father's world- pants too short and to big in the waist. So we left them in the bags all weekend- busy with other things I guess. Tonight I took them out to prewash Grace's and to iron and hang Tyler's. I pulled them out, hung them on Grace's dresser knobs and turned to vacuum her room when I decided to look at them again. They were so cute all hanging next to each other... i got all nostalgic and then it hit me. Something's not right. TYLERS OUTFIT HAS NO PANTS. That's right folks. We bought the outfit and neglected to make sure it had pants. I swear it did at one point but now I remmeber I had been holding the 3T for a while when comparing and when I switched to the 4T- I don't recall looking at it that closely. Gary inspected them but he said (when questioned by me tonight) that since we were hurrying and trying to visit he doesn't recall if he actually checked or not. I made him check the car- nothing. So, somewhere in Penny's at the Beaver Valley Mall lies a lonely pair of navy, pinstripe blue size 4T pants. Grrrr.... What do I do?!?! It's not like I can just walk into Penny's and explain this and they are just going to give me a pair of pants right?!? I'm devistated. Stupidest thing in the world to be upset over but I'm devistated! I said to Gary "What are we going to do?" and he goes "I don't know, I guess we didn't get as good of a deal as we thought." Thank you captain obvious.

For all you people who don't have time to read but like the pictures here you are! December so far-

Introducing Carrots!
Future Photographer?

Holding and grabbing toys more and more!
Playing in bed! She pulls the pooh and piglet behind her down on her head sometimes.
Flexible like mommy!
"Singing in the rain"
Our Christmas present from the Bush's. It's a little early! From this...

...to this!
Playing with puzzles. She likes this one b/c she can grab (and eat) the pieces.
Grace's first snow.
A few days later we got lots more and I took Tyler out. We had no snowpants and the zipper of his coat is broken so we had many many layers on!
"I can't put my arms down!"

I pulled him around the yard in a cardboard box- what a workout! (not pictured)
Papa came the next day with a sled and snowpants and we went down the hill several times!

Head first and backwards!


On his tummy too!

We went to visit Lori at the Beaver Valley Mall. Tyler was obsessed with the train! Thanks for the ride Lori!
She got the kids gifts including this bowling set
Lori and I
Grace with the princess in Lori's office.


Merry Christmas!!

07 Dec 2007 more snow! My dad came over last night and brought two things we badly needed! A real sled and snowpants for Tyler! We bundled him all up again (much easier with snowpants!!!) and he and my dad went out. I had planned on doing my hair and makeup to get ready to go out to dinner, change Grace and just relax while they were out but the second they went out the door I just felt like I had to go out and at least take pictures. I doned my coat, boots and gloves and grabbed the camera. You should have seen Tyler on this sled. My dad got one of those round disk things and put string on it so we could pull him around. My dad pulled him to the hills out behind our house and I missed the first one or two downhill trips but by the time I got out there Tyler was going down by himself, and carrying the sled back up the hill himself! It was hysterical. He was panting and saying "this is fun!" going down and "this is hard!" going back up. There were other neighborhood kids out with thier mom (the kids who scream profanity day and night and were yelling something at me and Tyler yesterday out thier front door) and Tyler copied everything they did. He went down on his back, on his butt, on his tummy and head first! It was so much fun! I went a few times with him and of course I fell and got my jeans all soaked. It was worth getting to dinner late! This morning I thingk we have 3 more inches and it's been snowing constantly since 7 when I first looked out the window. I knew we'd have a lot when I heard the plow at 6 am! Usually they don't get around to us till closer to 9. By then everyone in the neighborhood is long gone! Except me! I'm off to finish presents for tonight and get them all wrapped! We're going to PA to see Lori! It should be 3 hours round trip but if this snow keeps up it'll be a long night!!!

05 Dec 2007 T I R E D Whew! SNow is hard work! We all know I"m not an outdoorsy person. My mom probably had to pick me up and take me outside as a kid. I was the kid who considered a good day of playing outside to be sitting on the porch or by a tree on a blanket reading a book... or three. I don't like bikes or games or running or balls. I do like to swim outside and eat outside but that's it. Seriously. So this morning when I woke up to see the 5 inches of snow outside I decided it was my obligation to my son to allow him to experience playing out in the snow. I put on him socks, boots, 3 pairs of pants, a jumper, 3 shirts, a sweatshirt, insulated vest, winter coat, two hats, scarf and mittens. He seriously looked like Randy on A Christmas Story. It was hysterical. Tyler is a tip-toe walker so getting his feet flat into those boots was a CHORE! I bundled myself up too and out we went. It was not good packing snow, I tried. With the option of snowmen out I was kind of at a loss of what to do. YOu can only kick a ball around so long before it kind of shrivles up. (this was new to me!) We ran around some, he rolled around a lot and then we took some toys to the garage. I've been asking Gary to clear out the backyard for months and of course it has not been done so now i'm going to have to do it. I took the sandbox and toys, the basket of toys, the wheelbarrows and toy mower and the grill. I also took the stupid umbrella from the patio table b/c it blows in the wind making noise and irritates me. So Gary won. Bah humbug. Anyways, while in the garage I was looking for a garbage can lid so I could pull Tyler around and we only have one which is what Gary stores chemicles on. So I found a Gala Apple box, probably from Aldi and figured that would do. Eventually it'll jsut fall apart right? Then we can use that as our excuse to go in. So bungee cord and box became super sled and Tyler LVOED it! He has no idea what a sled is anyways so he didn't care. I ran through the snow pulling that kid for a half hour and i hurt head to toe. I"m also starving. He loved it! He kept falling out on purpose and he had to roll onto his tummy to even get up. It was great. I got some video but as I was running while taking it i dout it's very good. I"ll try to post pix in the near future though. So I did it. I won over my fear of the great outdoors. Everything's drip drying in the garage and now it's time to get Grace up from her nap, feed them both lunch (and me maybe?) and then put Tyler down for his nap and do the dishes, play with Grace, do some laundry, clean up the downstairs and plan dinner.... yea... that's not all going to happen! Sorry Gary! I"ll win this round!

04 Dec 2007 more run-around

03 Dec 2007 Jack and Paul Oliver WHOEVER YOU ARE PAY YOUR DEBTS SO THAT YOUR CREDITORS STOP CALLING MY HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ugh. I'm slightly peeved. I hate these recordings. You push any of the choice buttons and all you get is the same message and you can't talk to a real person. The old recording didn't even give a freaking phone number. This newer one i'm not even listening too. Seriously! Let me talk to a real person. I don't care if they are in another country and can barely speak English just let me make these people STOP CALLING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's my own fault for thinking it's a family member or my husband and running from the dishes or the laundry in the basement or the giving of a bottle to answer the phone... geesh... In other news Grace has slept all night two nights in a row now! She's eaten/gone to bed around 9 pm and gotten up between 7 and 8. I think the trick is the shorter naps which makes me so sad. She sleeps about the same as Tyler does. I swear at this age he slept like 18 hours a day. Makes me wonder why i could never get anything done in those days...Ok, it was more like 15. 10-12 at night and two 2-hour naps. She'll be my kid who gives up naps completely at age 18 months and I'll be locking her in her room for "quiet" time. *sigh* Or maybe she just recently went through a growth spurt (common at 6 months right!?!?!?!?!?!?!?) and that's why she was taking 3-6 short naps and needing to eat every 5 hours..... ;) I'm counting today as Grace's first snow b/c it's been on the ground that I've seen it more than 6 hours. I don't count snow as snow if it melts by 8:30 am and that last snow Canton got we didn't get hardly a dusting! Plus I can't go back to November and take a picture for the scrapbook. Tyler's good. Happy as can be. DRIVING ME CRAZY. I swear he was SO bad this weekend I was in tears several times. I mean when you get to the point where you wonder how many spankings a day is too many it might be time to re-evaluate what's going on here! My problem is that I take everything personally which is just stupid. He pooped in his underpants durring nap 3 times in the past 5 days so as you can imagine that puts me in a bit of a "mood". Yesterday I got the bright idea of sticking him in the corner b/c the little swats were just making him scream hysterically for 10 minutes and then resume running, throwing, hitting and plain ticking us off. He HATED having to stand in the corner. Today he's been pretty good... so far. By Sunday Gary and I are both exhausted and I think the craziness of running around Saturday and the short/late nap just set him off. We're not all that patient by Sunday afternoon. I also need to reintroduce vegtables to his diet. The Ped. asked me at his checkup if he's a picky eater or if he eats a balanced diet for me. I said he ate a balanced diet but of course he'll eat more of some things than others. (He'll eat more fries than green beans but then so will I.) She said that was fine and apparently genius Tyler decided that being picky sounded like a great idea so he's not eaten well since. Is there some kind of chemical reaction when they change ages? When he turned 2 it was all crazy like this too!! Is it the never-ending birthday celebrations with every member of the family on top of Thanksgivng travels and the anticipation of Christmas that's just too much for little ones? YES!! I thought teaching them was bad but this whole parenting of preschoolers thing is just way over my head sometimes!!!! We also had our first service in the new building for Grace Community Church so I think the excitemet of that had him in a tizzy. Pray for us tomorrow... we're headed to a free clinic by the health department for Grace's immunization shots. Pray she doesn't contract some crazy disease or something.

29 Nov 2007 The Golden Compass Spread the word about this movie ... The Golden Compass It is coming out on December 7th It is marketed for children and in the end they kill God and everyone can do as they please. It stars Nicole Kidman, which will help to make it seem mainline and OK. However, it is written by Phillip Pullman, a proud atheist who hates Chritianity and wants to 'kill God' in the minds of children. The movie is a 'dumbed-down' version of the first book in a trilogy which themes get progressively darker and darker. Please pass this on so that unsuspecting parents won't be lured into it. We all know that Satan's best works are ones that seem nice and harmless on the top. This seems to fall into that category. Most of all, read for yourself what Snopes has to say about it. http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/compass.asp If you are as alarmed by what you read on snopes as I was, please forward this email. Be sure to read the SNOPES article!!

28 Nov 2007 oh the joy of forwards A young lady came home from a date looking rather sad. She told her mother, "Arthur proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him how wrong he is." ********************************************************* MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Amen to This! *Twas the month before Christmas* *When all through our land,* *Not a Christian was praying* *Nor taking a stand.* *See the PC Police had taken away,* *The reason for Christmas - no one could say.* *The children were told by their schools not to sing,* *About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.* *It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say* * December 25th is just a "Holiday ".* *Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit* *Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!* *CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod* *Something was changing, something quite odd! * *Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa* *In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.* *As Targets were hanging their trees upside down* * At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.* *At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears* *You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.* *Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-is-ty* *Are words that were used to intimidate me.* *Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen* *On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !* *At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter* *To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.* *And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith* ; * Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace* *The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded* *The reason for the season, stopped before it started.* *So as you celebrate "Winter Break" under your "Dream Tree"* *Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.* *Choose your words carefully, choose what you say* *Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS, Not Happy Holiday!*

i am so stuffed! Thank goodness I've been wroking out daily or i would be in serious trouble! We got to see all the grandparents and great grandparents this weekend already! We did a good job! Thursday we did Golden Corall with the Bush/Kandray family and my mom came too. It was poined out by Josh that the largest people in Ohio congregate there. I laughed but when we got there it was true!!! Tyler ate a basket of bread. Literally. He ate three of those huge rolls, about a bite of all the thanksgiving food, and some manderine oranges and candy corns. Grace had her first ever mashed potatoes. I thought at the time that they were just mashed up potatoes, it did not even occur to me until we were changing some interesting diapers that night that it also probably had some sort of cream and butter in it as well as salt! Oops! We went back to the Kandray and Bush houses and then home to pack for the traveling part of the weekend. Friday we got up and attempted to get to my dad's early- with a two hour trip this means before noon.... We had to stop at Walmart for diapers and it was 9:00. The place was deserted! I figure all the crazy people were already home in bed by then! :) Techincally I can say that I did some shopping on "black friday". We had spagetti for lunch with my dad and he took Tyler to the beach. (He lives on Lake Erie) Tyler is a smart boy. He knows that most of the fun in going to the beach is getting your feet wet. He convinced my dad of this and oh how I wish I'd have seen the look on his face when the water was 30 degrees!!! We had prime rib for supper. IT WAS SO GOOD!!! We went to my grandma's afterwards for desert but when we got there they had not eaten yet! You'll not be surprised to know that Tyler had a plate! I had a bite of turkey and some potatoes and a roll. All my favorites. ;) "If it's white it's right!" That's my moto!! We also had my grandma's home-made German Chocolate cake to celebrate my mom's birthday. It was nice to all get to be together. My grandparents, my mom, the four of us, my aunt toots, uncle Steward and aunt Bonni, Lauren, Michaela, Agust (grandpa's brother) and Galdys, and in addition we had Pastor Kelly and Manus (thier neighbor). Full house! We stayed at my mom's and rested this morning (Tyler ate two breakfasts) and then went to see my other grandma (dad's side). We had pizza (Tyler had THREE pieces) and celebrated Christopher's 17th birthday (Tyler had cake too!!). How fun to have pizza Thanksgiving weekend!!! :) Now we're home, the tree is up and Gary's trying to figure out how many lights we have that work. I was thinking on the way home how nice it is to have people provide us so many meals over the holidays! Saves me having to cook and the dishes too! Most of all since Tyler eats like his father it gives people a chance to see how it really is! I swear people think we don't feed him! Tonight when the kids go to bed I imagine we'll watch A Christmas Story. Actually, Gary has a soccer game at 9 so I'll probably watch it alone. Imagine... I might get to hear all the lines without all the men in the family laughing in my ear! Happy Thanksgiving!!! PS Actually the game is at 7 so we're all going! Yippeee!!!!

I did it, he did it, aha moments and such Saturday's Bush Boy Birthday Bash was wonderful. I"ve recovered. I'm enjoying all the toys being in the basement or up in Tyler's room. I'm glad to have some things cleared out in anticipation for Christmas! The tree will go up Saturday night! I can't wait! I love getting the decorations out. It's like my own private christmas- unwrapping and seeing the treasures inside! I'm most excited about finding Grace a first Christmas bulb and getting her a stocking and a Christmas dress... I"m so blessed! He did it: SUCESS!!! (knock on wood) Tyler has been diaper free besides night time for like 3 days now with no accidents. Before that he'd been in them all day but not for naps. He still wont tell me when he has to go but we are making major progress. I'm also saving major money on diapers which reminds me we need more size 3's for the girl with 6 BM's a day. Won't she be thrilled to read this when she's 13? I did it. I got my lazy rear out of bed, bathed, fed and dressed both kids and myself and got us all to the doctor's office this morning. Alert the media. I left my house ON TIME and got to the office EARLY!!!!! They were running late so I got to entertain Tyler in the FULL OF SICK KIDS waiting room for 40 minutes. Thank the Lord Grace sat in her seat! Grace is perfectly healthy and her head is fine. Whew! I've been worried about the back of her head being flat for awhile and the worry increased Saturday. Dr. said it's fine- big based on percentiles, but fine. She went from 50th to 75th percentiles on head circumfrance! I could have told you it's huge. She's wearing a 12-18 month hat! She's 16 lbs 5 oz and 25 1/2 inches long. I didn't get to see her chart with percentiles but the Dr. said she's perfectly healthy. I call it pleasantly plump. She's gonna have my thighs I believe. (at 6 months Tyler was 19 lbs and over 27 inches) Tyler is 36 lbs and 39 1/2 inches. He's grown an inch since July and 4 inches in the past year. He's also only gained 4 lbs in the past year. Maybe he's FINALLY slowing down! Of course at his 2YR appt, he'd shrunk an inch and a half b/c of the differnce in measuring them standing and laying down. Hmm.... (side note: I'm 62 inches standing up really straight.... any bets on when he'll pass me up? If he keeps growing 4 inches a year he'll be 9. ) So anyways, for anyone who's ever met Tyler you know- He's a tiptoe walker just like his dad, uncles and grandfathers before him. His achilles tendon seems tight so we have to take him to a Pediatric Orthopidic Doctor up in Akron. Right before Christmas. I figure they will just give us excersises and want to see him again in 6 months. He physically (obviously!!!) can walk and run and get around just fine so I don't think it's going to be anything major. I pray that! I also found that the reason his one tooth has turned grey is likely to be from trauma. Hmmm... maybe when he got kicked in the face at nursery? There was another time he had a bloody lip recently but I can't remember what happened... I'll have to read back through blogs! haha! Anyways he's due to go for his first cleaning anyways so I got the name of a pediatric dentist in Canton to take him to. I also have GOT to figure out a way to teach him to spit. Dr said it's no big deal and to just keep using the non floride toothpaste.... *blushes*.... I ought to get some of that! I'll be sure to tell the grandma's to get some for his stockings! (oh calm down- I do have some.) So that was our appointment today. The Doctor was very patient and spent a good bit of time with us and I was very thankful. I was so ready to get a new doctor (again) but you know, if you are giong to have to wait 40 minutes in the waiting room you want a doctor to see you right away in the exam room (she did), answer your questions (she did), and spend plenty of time with you and your kids (she did). So, possibly against my better judgement, we'll stick with her. Don't like the office, but do like the doctor. I'm not sure how many of my readers will remember how the front desk lady was downright unhelpful and rude when i was getting information on taking Grace to the surgeon but today I had a different lady. Sit down- she offered to call the doctors office for me and make an appointment. SAY WHAT?!?! She did! I kid you not! I said YES! Hey, if that's an option lets just get it done now & save me some minutes on my long distance phone card! She got me the number to pre-register my insurance, an appontment and directions to the office! I LOVE THIS LADY! THEN she let me schedule Grace's next appointment right there too! She even had a smile on her face! wow. I was floored. I seriously might send a card to the office thanking them for treating me like a person. As I left gary was getting into a meeting so I ran over to Steph's work (shh! Don't tell pops!) to say hi. She happened to be on an easy day schedule wise so we got to hang out for a little bit and then go out to lunch and gary met us there! I've not had lunch with gary since summer so that was really nice. Especially since he went to work early today (6:30) and works late (8:30). I know that most people work long days and I know gary has a decent work schedule but these days are still rough. I'm thankful they aren't worse and at least he does come home at night, but it's rough. Especially when I know that things could be done to make it so he does not have to work those kinds of hours. It's out of our hands and he's doing the right thing and so I support that. All that to say it turned out to be a great morning. Tyler's down for his nap, (you know it takes me hours to write these blogs right? Getting inturrpted constantly....) Grace will eat in about a half hour which means I have 30 MORE minutes to myself! yay! Aha- I figured out today that if I don't check my email and do my shower the day before I can get us all ready in 2 hours. Barely. Why? Why does it take so long to get these kids ready? And me? I actually wore out the door the first outfit I tried on today. That's like a first - ever. Thank you Jen for these AMAZING Gap Jeans. I'm going to wear them out so I might as well pay you for them! 3 more waist inches and I can get my own. Speaking of waist inches- Jackie K. if you are reading this I just have to say it's SO unfair that you look like you never had a kid. I hate you in that you're-my-best-friend-and-i-love-you-but-i'm-so-jealous-and-happy-for-you kind of way! As I finished typing that I reached for my cupcake i was eating...hmmmmmm.....connection??? Nah. I realized recently that I'm at a point in my life where the majority of the people I know now never knew me when I was "skinny". When I look at myself I see a fat girl and see what has changed in the past 10 years. I figure people see what I see- so much change and the "now" is worse than the "before". When I think about it though, right now I actually (in a few places) look better than I have in a long time. I wonder if this is why women are so bad at taking compliments. When people tell me I'm pretty (Thanks Melissa!) it means the world to me but I also dissagree because I still see myself as what I was in high school. Id love to look that way again but I can't sacrifce health for beauty now that I have a husband and kids. Does this make any sense?!?!? What makes it so hard for us as women to accept the "now" as beautiful and not just the "before" or the "where we wish we could go"? I mean sure, I'd love to get bigger boobs and lose 40 pounds and look like Eva Longoria but would I be any happier? Would I see myself and see beautiful? I doubt it. That balance is hard. I have to be more healthy, I have to change some things about my body but I also have to accept who I am now, not who i want to be or was. I have so many things I want to teach my kids- I really need to learn some of those things for myself again. I heard once that we spend a lot of money on things we don't want to impress people we don't even know or like. I think that's true with self image too. Working out every day should be for no one else but me and to take care of the one body God gave me. I need to keep it in shape so I don't have to get replacement parts! I was going to comment on something else but I can't recall... oh well... Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Travel safe this weekend!

we’re all just fine thanks.... You know you've not been on enough when ppl are asking how you are and the phone is ringing off the hook with ppl other than salesmen calling. We're alive. We're happy. We're tired... :) Tyler's b-day last friday was amazing. I sang to him in the morning when I went in to get him and he smiled ear to ear and said "I turned into three!!!!!" It was adorable. He said it all weekend. He holds up four fingers and says four sometimes b/c he wants so dearly to be like his friend Aubrey. We played and fielded family and friend phone calls and emails all day. I got the kids both hand and foot printed I also let tyler color a picture for his scrapbook with markers and do a fingerpaint page for his art book. I found a hand-me-down Thomas jumper in the closet he wore and he loved it. Thurs night Gary had run all over two towns looking for balloons and got a Cars one and a Mickey Mouse one. Tyler has not stopped playing with them yet. After Gary got home we decided to go out to McD's instead of the planned family picnic and movie at home. We stopped for a few minutes to see Steph who had called twice lamenting over not seeing her precious Tyler ON his actual birthday. Pops wasn't there but Tyler wrangled the heartstrings and managed to score one b-day gift. We were off to the McD's with indoor playland. Tyler loved it. Of course Grandma and Pops just had to stop by on thier way down to the cabin. Was I surprised? not at all! There was a party and big kids were on that playland but thankfully they were all very careful around Tyler. We stopped on the way home to get frosting for the disaster of a cake that awaited us at home... I bought one of those silicone cupcake things that makes them in shapes and you assemble the shapes and end up with a train. yea... not so much. They bubbled over a LOT and then didn't come out of the pan very well ....at all.... and I used tons of spray. I managed to make it look something like a cake with the help of lots of frosting. I don't have a cake decorator set and forgot till that day that Jennifer had offered hers so I went wtih the old baggie with the cut edge method... It looked horrible from a Martha Stewart standpoint but Tyler just loved it. I even used yellow candies to make a "1" on the side so he knew it was Thomas. It was fine for just the 3 of us. We then let him open his gifts. We got him 200 wooden blocks, a Bible and a little 2$ construction set. the ppl are like the old army men we all used to play with and this set came with three trucks and like 50 little guys and signs and cones. Guess what he liked best? Guess what i've stepped on 300 times already... Saturday we way overslept and then had tons of shopping to do. We did Cici's Pizza for lunch and were releieved to find that we still have another full year of free eating for Tyler there. If Gary and Tyler are both hungry I swear we actually make money at a buffet. We did a ton of cleaning in the basement and Gary took two carloads FULL of stuff out of here. One full load of clothes and another of junk/donate stuff. It's so nice to have that extra space! Sunday we did church and then the day at the Bush's. They got Tyler some much needed socks and underpants as well as another car and a Thomas figure 8 train set. We also watched the Browns lose to the Steelers but they at least looked like a football team for more than one quarter. Monday we played with all the new toys. It's so nice not to be so bored and to have new things to play with! I'm sure we did other things but I can't remember... Tuesday I cleaned my kitchen like a mad woman all morning prepping for Jen to come scrapbook and cook. I love when she comes. She provides adult conversation, an excuse to scrapbook, and entertainment for Tyler in the form of Jack. I just love how they play together. It's one of those situations where they play like boys and both Jen and I worry about that balance b/n letting them be boys and teaching them not to beat each other up. Last night we went to Alliance to get the boys haircuts and I found a blouse at Penny's for $3.15 with tax. I even had a gift card to use! Thanks Lori! Grace has started to sit up by herself. She does very well on the couch but not so well on the floor yet. She still hates being on her tummy and rolls right over but I don't mind. I don't think it'll stunt her growth or anything. We're still nursing primarily and Friday she's 26 weeks. She'll probably be on full formula by Christmas but we'll see. Some days I'm just ready to be done and some days the formula is just too much hassle. Last night was her first real night of sleeping through the night. She nursed at 9 pm and was in bed alseep shortly after 10. I chose not to wake her for her midnight feeding to see hwo she'd do. She woke at 5 AM and i got her paci for her and braced myself for the usual hour of crying and eventually her endind up in her seat (in her room though so I half win...) but I woke up again when Gary's alarm went off! I was still on my back half uncovered! I was afraid to get to comfortable. She woke ready to eat at 7 and I was thrilled. She was up for only 20 minutes before she was falling alseep on me so I put her back down and she slept till close to 9:30. Countdown 3 more days till our big birthday bash here so I should be cleaning... I'm finishing my last few scrapbook pages and then it's all getting packed up and stored away. I hope everyone is well and enjoying our last warm day in Ohio until May! It's in the 60's right now but supposed to snow tomorrow. That means the lawn will be neglected... again....

Paul Harvey Writes: We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I'd like better. I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would. I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated. I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car. And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen. It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep. I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in. I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room,but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him. When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her. I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely. On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom. If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one. I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books. When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head. I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy..girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like. May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole. I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it.. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend. I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle. May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays. I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Hannukah/Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand. These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it's the only way to appreciate life. Written with a pen. Sealed with a kiss. I'm here for you. And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.

08 Nov 2007 three I just tucked Tyler into bed for the night. I told him tomorrow when he wakes up and the sun is shining (because otherwise he'll wake up 50 times in the night) he will be three. Then I kind of lost it. Three. I've been a mom for THREE YEARS! I remember completly the moment he was born. After 3 hours of pushing, maybe more I don't remember, he finally came. Dr Shutko put him on my stomach and I telly you truly, he lifted his head and looked me right in the eyes. I fell completely head over heels in love. I believe in love at first sight without a doubt. I"m not sure it happens with couples-it didn't for Gary and I, but for some, it happens with kids. At that moment I understood so many things about love and life that I had never understood before. I understood the pain God must have felt when he gave his Son to die. I understood the love that made him do it. I understood why women are willing to give up and change who they are to care for and love their kids. In that moment I changed. I can't even tell you how or why but I changed. I grew. I learned. I ached and felt true bliss at the same time. That has happend 4 times in my life. The moment I recieved Christ as my Savior, the moment I fell in love with Gary, the moment Tyler was born, and the moment Grace was born. With Grace it happened differently but it was there. I'm so blessed. I wish for Tyler so many things. The things every mom wishes. Enough trials to teach but not enough to discourage. Enough pain to appreciate but enough love to make it better. A love for the Lord. More I can't even put into words. I realized tonight that when I wake up something will have changed. Hopefully it will be just the number of candles on a cake. The number of fingers he holds up when people ask him how old he is. Tonight I tucked in my baby. My first baby. he's a boy now. It sounds so stupid. he's been a boy, not a baby, for so long now. I missed it. They say we never miss the firsts but we always miss the lasts. I pray that I won't get so busy with life that one day I wake up and realize he's changed so much that I don't know him. I want to remember always who he is, who he was, and who I pray he will become. I want to remember the way he'll look at me after a spanking and say "I want you to be happy Mommy" and fall into my arms crying. I want to remember the way he'll sit on the floor and push his trains with me. I want to remember the way he sings the Veggie Tales Hairbrush song and Jesus Loves Me. I want to remember him singing every song on our Kutless CD. I want to remember the way he watches TV just like his daddy. He doesn't move or realize anything else is going on around him. I want to remember the way he sings the ABC's when he washes his hands without being reminded. The way he runs to help Grace when she cries and runs to tell me she needs me but needs him more. I want to remember him playing basketball in the living room with Daddy or running in circles singing and making crazy noises. I want to remember the way every time something dings or beeps he comes running to tell me it's done. I want to remember the way his face lights up when it snows or he finds a flower. They way my pockets have been full of dandiloions - every one hand picked and sniffed by him first. The way he says sorry for tracking dirt in the house and then keeps on walking. The way he mops the floors and the walls because it's "faster". The way he points to family members in scrapbooks and names and describes them. They way he adds blessings and "have a good day" for people at the end of his lunchtime prayers. The way he talks of God in his heart and God loving him. The way he acts like Noah saving the animals- all except the bugs. The way he'll sit and want me to read the same story over and over and five minutes later be running with his dump truck. The way he knows every family member and what kind and color vehicle they have. I want to remember the way he hugs me and gives kisses. The way Eskimo kisses are his favorite. The way he says "sorry and ask forgiveness" when time out ends. The way he throws himself into my arms for no reason or tackles me. I want to remember his kind, compassionate nature. I want to remember everything and treasure it all. I understand this verse more and more each day. Luke 2: 19 But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. Most of all, I want Tyler to remember how loved he is.

I feel so old when I say stuff like this but "I can't belive how fast the week went!" :) It was a pretty typical week. There were moments when I wanted to run away to Mexico never to return and moments where I loved my life and wanted to pause time and cherish each moment a little more slowly. Last Sunday gary played drums in church so I somehow managed to get the three of us up and ready and out the door in less than an hour. We were still late but the clocks were slower than ours so we were on time. We stopped at the nursery first since I had coats in addition to the bag and two kids and the carseat (which I have to take in b/c they have nothing to put Grace in or on when they are not holding her b/c they meet in the nurses office of an elemntary school. Don't worry, it's not lost on me the fact that besides the bathroom this is likely the room with the most germs in the entire building. We have service in the cafeteria which may be #3 for germs. Thankfully my kids seem to have a good immune system and the room always looks extremely clean.) Of course as usual Tyler was acting all shy. I think letting him sleep in till the last minute and then leaving is affecting his abilty to seperate from me when we get there. He's got to learn though. I agreed he could go into service wtih me but I should have left him. He sat well for the first song or so then he seemed to want to lay on me. He'd been up till 10:30 the night before so i knew he'd be crabby. He was jumping around and being... well... being two... and then he kicked over Pop's coffee. Pops and Gary were leading worship and Steph and Josh were on the other side of me and didn't see it till I had left, with both kids, to go find some paper towels. We meet in the cafeteria and they have a teacher room open with cofee and donuts () but they had NO PAPER TOWELS!! So we went to the bathroom to get them and Steph and Josh helped us all clean up. This took about a whole song and I've no doubt every person in the church was watching me/us. Shortly after that Tyler disobeyed again, and I took him out. I kept Grace with me b/c she usually still sits well and makes no noise so I try to enjoy the time with her and it allows me to pass her around to those who don't get to hold her before service b/c I'm always late. She even fell asleep in my arms! Tyler did well once I left him which cemented in my mind that I need to be more firm about making him stay. I really want him to learn to sit through the music though. I'm devising a new plan so we may start it this week... We went to Texas Roadhouse with the Bush's to celebrate GARY TURNING THIRTY and Tyler was tired and hungry- not a good combo. As long as we let him eat bread he's fine. I've decided that from now on we're going to order him a side of applesauce and share our sides with him there. H literally ate an entire basket of bread himself. Maybe more b/c Gary and I were both feeding him. Grace dind't need her bottle until I was ready to eat. I expected it though so it was fine. Small group was after nap and he was the only kid so Amanda and him played outside for a long time. This completely wore him out so we all got a good night sleep Sunday! :) Monday we had to go shopping and Tyler ended up at the bush's helping rake leaves and then jump in them. he didn't do it really last year but this year he was really into it! Gary, Grace and I hit walmart alone! wow! What a difference! Tuesday Jen and Jack came and the boys played and we scrapped. I got a lot done and Jen got two entire layouts done. What a fun day it was. Tyler had an episode that I can't bring myself to tell anyone about but suffice to say it's a good thing there were witnesses... Wednesday was trick or treat in Alliance adn it was so fun! Tyler was not into the scary costumes a lot of kids had on. He kept calling them "mad" boys and "sad" boys and even one he called a "very bad" boy. This huge guy was walking around in a white suit with top hat and cane and clown hair and as you got closer he had on this really scary mask and when he talked the voice was all distorted and he was giving out suckers. I know Tyler was completely freaked and had htis guy had anything other than a Thomas train or a sucker Tyler would have cried. He freaked me out! It was like IT was live in Alliance. i was not happy. I mean come on. If you are giong to be a scary clown walking around at age 30 please don't walk up to my 2 year old. Everyone thought he was the cutest thing ever (he was and is!) and he ate it up! His Thomas bucket was a big hit too. Even when he dropped it several times! We took a pertty long route to get past our pastor's house and towards the end Tyler was stopping at stoops and wanting to eat and rest. Finally he said we had enough candy and it was time to be done and go back to Uncle Dale and Aunt Mary's house. We got him to go to about 6 mroe on the way back but the last few he was yelling to the people on thier porches that he had enough. The last house he got all theway to thier sidewalk and remembered he was "done" and I had to almost drag him the last 5 steps. The lady thought it was cute and said since he had enough the candy could be for me. :). We rested awhile at Dale and Mary's and then we made him go to the mansion houses on thier block b/c I wanted to see them. he had a meltdown when the sucker he was eating got covered in cat hair when he petted a cat. He was just furious that I would not let him eat that sucker! He ran across another yard or two and I let him have a bite sized rescee cup which appeased him for about 5 minutes. @ the Mills an hour later he ate 2 pieces of pizza and drank (and spilled) a ton of water. Finally we left but of course it was about a half hour too late. He was over tired and grace was frantic. Thankfuly she screamed herelf to sleep after only 2 minutes! Yesterday I was a mad woman cleaning and cooking all day for the Neely Clan. Tyler had a few meltdowns and I called Gary crying. I think sometimes I expect to much of him. Some days are just better than others for both of us. He's easygoing like his dad but when he's upset he's pretty forceful and crazy like me. We had a wonderful dinner though and the kids all played well together. I just loved it. I love having people over. I love having adults for us both to talk to. It was amazing! We sat at the kitchen table almost 3 hours and talked! 4 adults!! Tyler was introduced the concept of a wooden spoon and his behavior today was 500% better than yesterday! He did have a couple nightmares or night terrors last night which really freaked me out. Thankfully I had more patience at 1 and 3 AM than i did all morning Thursady. Lots of excitement this week! He's also had probably 10 pieces of candy in the past 7 days and before that he probably had 10 pieces of candy in the previous 4 months. It's that time of year though where we aren't slowing down any so we're going to have to really watch his cues and not let him get too overly stimulated.... or at least try! Tonight we need to go shopping, tomorrow is Aubrey's birthday party and sometime this weekend we are going up to Cleveland to see Hannah and Zia. Monday we're going to the park, my dad will probably be here Wednesday, Thursday I'm going to my mom's for the day and Friday is his birthday! In the words of the Little Enstiens "Hold on tight cuz here we go!!" To update on Grace she's 24 weeks today. She's so good at the tummy to back roll that she won't stay on her tummy. :) She doesn't get near enough tummy time and hates it but we're working on it. I looked up what she should be doing by this age and she's not far behind if at all so I'm not going to stress about it. I've tried not to read any of that stuff with her. I"m not near as anxious for her to do new things as I was with Tyler. Funny how kids will change you. She sits with assistance still and loves it. She's obsessed with her feet. She likes to sit and grab her toes and kick so she looks like a little cheerleader which i love. Gary rolls his eyes. She bangs her toys together and throws them and giggles. She's doing better with cereal but still not crazy about bananas. Next week we may start squash but again, I"m in no hurry. She still only eats a couple tablespoons of cereal a day if that. Many days we skip solids altogether. She still sleeps 6-8 hours straight, they just usually come from midnight to 8 am. I'm a night person anyways so it works out for the most part. She loves books and wants to touch everything. She loves hair, mouths and eyes of anyone holding her too. She's just a joy and I could talk about her all day. Her favorite alone thing to do is the excersaucer or walker. She likes the different position and her legs are getting stronger! Tyler adores her which makes every day even more special. He's a pro at handwashing, helping me with Grace, getting in and out of his seat and eating alone. he's also gotten MUCH better with his lidless cup. Like everything else he'll do anything as long as he wants to. He's such a man. "...as long as it's his idea!" I could go on but you really ought to be off the computer now. he he hee....

..it’s time to celebrate... This is take two since Grace deleted this message earlier this morning when I let her type. I wanted to write and congratulate

Daniel and Hannah Pierre

on the birth of their daughter

Zia Evangelina

yesterday at 1:18 pm. After an easy induction she was born 7lbs 2 oz and 19.5 inches long. She has dark eyes and dark hair and they hope to all go home sometime today or tomorrow morning. I am so thankful that after such a hard pregnancy Hannah was able to have such a positive birth experience. (We decided together that being 4 cm and 90% effaced helped a great deal!!) Both mom and baby are doing well! Pray for them as a family as they go from a family of 3 to a family of 4! Also pray for their son Alceo (2) as this will be a huge adjustment for him! Our other great news is that we found out this morning that our renters have gotten all of the utilities in their names and picked up the keys! They will be moving belongings in this week and moving in to live there Friday! I expect to receive our first rent check in the mail this weekend or early next week! We are so thrilled. This is not what we initially wanted but we are thankful that the Lord has relieved us of hopefully a years worth of mortgage and extra utility payments. Thank you all for continued prayers!!

These are all out of order... OCT 27, 2007

Tyler in his Thomas costume

With his Thomas bucket!

Daddy and Thomas

Mommy and Thomas

Dressed warm for the cold!

Singing Princess Angel

I'm not looking mommy!

Maybe I'll look a little...

Grace in her Christening "Princess" dress

(Sorry I've neglected posting on here! Recent blogs: OCT 28 5,000 miracles... give or take... Haha! Yesterday was SO much fun!! I got up while everyone was sleeping (miracle 1) and got myself dressed and at least some makeup on. Jen and I loaded up her vehicle and away we went to our scrapbooking day. We got there FOUR MINUTES EARLY and I didn't get her lost. (miracle 2-20- I figure that counts as at least 19 gracious acts of God ) We got to sit and visit sans kids for 4 hours!! (miracles 21-3,000) Can you imagine?!?! Gary brought the kids by so I could feed Grace miday and went to his mom's where he could be fed for free.) Jennifer got tons of title's done for her pages that I know she's been wanting to get to for months. I got at least 5 layouts done (I did work a little when we got home) and so Tyler's birth and the year 2004 are pretty much done. (miracle 's 3001-3005) I want to go back and do some more embelishing, titling and journaling but the photo's are printed and down on paper in order. I also got all of January 2005 done. YIPPEEEEE!!!! (Miracle 3,006) We are going to tempt fate and God's humor and try to get together a couple times a month to scrap... with or without kids. :) Between that and my time with Melissa I could really get moving here! Maybe through May by years end! Anyways, we actually left Melissa's house a minute EARLY and got borders done that Melissa had planned! (miracles 3,007-9) I even remembered to give Jenn back her baby clothes that Grace is done with. That was actually kind of emotional. She wears so many hand-me downs that it's literally painful to give them up. This turns out to be a blessing (having to give them up) because we all know I'd be the old lady with 259 bins of kids clothes in the attic... and really that's kind of selfish isn't it? I do have PLENTY that I will be keeping so don't worry! I got grace fed and dressed in her christening dress we got as a gift when she was born. Since we don't do christening and I got it after we had her dedicated I decided it would make a great princess dress for Halloween (which sounds really immoral to say somehow ) and I hope to have her wear it again for Christmas. I took... oh... about 40 pictures of her in it because it is JUST SO BEAUTIFUL!!!! (miracles 3010-3050 b/c I had TIME). Then i even had to take it off of her and put her onsie, turtleneck, jeans and socks on and then put it back on top of all that so she wouldn't freeze for Trunk or Treat over at the community center. (Wasn't it just 85 two weeks ago?) We also got Tyler up from his nap and dressed in warm clothes and his Thomas costume from last year. oh yes -- it still fit! (Miracles 3050-3055) We're good parents and don't want him to be deprived of lifelong scaring so we'll probably make him wear it next year too. I got some photos of him on the front porch with the pumpkins and away we went. I thought we were running late but we got there inplenty of time. (miracles 3055-3060) Josh and the in-laws joined us and Tyler had a blast. Thomas was a big hit this year! Stephanie got him a Thomas bucket for his candy which was hilarious. Lots of kids had pillowcases which I thought SURE would prompt Gary to tell of his trick-or-treating days (OMG THE BROWNS JUST SCORED!!!) with pillowcases... I was dissapointed though. I DID, however, get to hear of Josh having to be a pirate every elementary school year ... Oh....poor baby. That's so in now! We must have seen 5 Captain Jack Sparrow's (which reminded me of your puppy Jackie V.!! You've got to dress him up in some dreds and a hat!!) Seeing these little kids with black pencil all over there faces and dreds was hysterical to me. We ran into the Neely Crew and dufus me neglected to introdce them to my family... and Gary. Turns out Garys' never actually met Jason and not surprisingly this completely slipped my mind till later in the car when he asked who was carrying Jack around for her. (He asked sarcastically- he knew.) Aubrey was beautiful in her princess costume with her updo! Had it not been raining I'd have tried to get pictures of all of us but the cold and the rain and 3 men who were ready to watch football kept us moving. Also I had two hats on Grace including the one that came with the dress and she looked more like a pilgrim in lace than a princess. She was also hidden by 3 blankets. I also saw Melanie and her fmaily and Angie and hers. I was satisfied with the event. We got a nice long hayride, plenty of pictures, plenty of candy, plenty of compliments on how cute my kids are, and I saw all 3 people I know from the church that were going to be there. (miracles 3061- 3075) We left there, hit McDonalds drive through where Tyler so politely said "Hi. I'm Tyler. I'd like a cheesburger with no onions and a diet coke and that will be it." It's such a shame that they can't hear what kids say in there... although most of the time I'm sure that's a blessing! We got behind an older lady who neglected to pay at the first window which got the employees all turned around. They sorted it rather quickly and got our order right. It's noteworthy though because we have recently watched a show about how McDonalds is taking over the world. Apparently they are new in the China market and the first ever drive throughs so the chinese have to teach them how to do a drive through. Gary and I (jokingly) said she must be chinese. oh, come on! That was kind of funny... anyways we went back to the Bush's so we could see Josh and watch the OSU game. We left at halftime which was about 40 minutes too late for me and Tyler. I was so tired and Tyler was beyond tired. (It's not surprising how craby he was this morning but that's another story). By the time we got home and all unpacked and underessed and the kids in bed it was almost time for Grace to eat again so that's when I finished my pages. AHHH.... what a fun day! PLUS the kids were good for Gary so it's likely he'll watch them again!! Miracles 3,076-5,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

26 Oct 2007

happy birthday Gary!

website fun... Happy Friday folks! Grace is 23 weeks. Gary is 30 and Tyler has only 2 weeks until he is 3! Whew! Bored on this third rainy day? I feel so bad we are getting all this rain and i'm complaining about it and in California they'd give anything for a few days of rain! I wanted to share a couple cool webistes I've found this week. One is www.realage.com You can take a quiz on there (about 5-10 min) and it will tell you the difference between your calendar age and your real age. My calendar age is 28.2 and my real age is 25.6! yay me! It would go down a lot if I took a vitamin and ate breakfast on a regular basis. Lowering my BMI woulnd't hurt either. It was very interesting to me and there are tons of links to educate you. I also found in my results a link to a quiz about what you are teaching your kids about health. We got 8 out of 10 stars. Not too bad! We also both heard this week about a site that gives you a questionaire that tells you which presidential candidate you agree most with. Gary and I had the same top 5 but in a different order. It was interesting too. www.votehelp.org be sure you look at the you vs candidate graph which explains how they get the results. Another one is http://www.selectsmart.com/president/2008.html I"m off to go try it! Have fun! 22 Oct 2007 Another 10 years... As we watched the Indians fall out of sinc with how to play baseball at some points over the past week Gary and I talked about the past games we've watched. Back when we were becoming friends in October of 97 we had similar heartbreak watching the Indians in whichever dorm lounge we could find them in. During the game last night I made the comment that if it takes them another 10 years to get this close that Grace will be 10 and Tyler will be getting ready to turn 13. Yikes! He had to add his most popular phrase... "It's just so frustrating being a Cleveland fan." Yea, but it makes us stronger right? That which does not kill us..... Speaking of which I ought to call my dad and be sure he didn't have a heart attack.... GO CAVS!! :) 18 Oct 2007 18 Oct 2007 Another day ... still no dollars. GO TRIBE!!!!!!!!! Also Grace is 5 months today! She decided to celebrate with her first runny nose. All together now "Awww--eeeeewwww!!!!!!!!!" She weighs 15 lbs according to our weigt together minus my weight on our scale. I thought she was big until I met a friend of Gary's at Target the other day who's son- same age- weighs 21 lbs and my friend from Mansfield who's son is 2 months older than Grace is in 12-18 month clothes!!! She's still my peanut!! She's small but she's a chunk let me tell you!!! I'm in the process of going through the 300 pix that my friend Melissa took for us this summer and deciding which to have printed. I"m so annoyed because again this is one of those things that we stay-at-home mom's have to sacrifice. I can't get every picture i want because that would have been over 100$. I've got it narrowed down to about 55$ including tax and shipping but that's a heafty price tag! Thankfully my dad has offered to pay for a photo sitting for Grace so we'll let him pay for Christmas pictures. :) In other news -kind of related- we are officially in the process of renting our Mansfield house (ie The Summer Cottage). We recieved two applications and credit checks last week. I felt like both had positives and negatives but the credit scores where very different so we went with the people who's scores were higher. Gary had a much stronger opionion on the matter and since I just want him to take care of it everything worked out. He called them and they accepted so they are in the process now of paying the deposit (which will pay the realtor who helped in the process) and getting utilities in thier names. They will pay first months rent Nov. 1 and move in the second. Gary will have to make a couple trips over to Mansfield this weekend and we'll be shelling out some money upfront but we'll make it back. It comes out of the savings account so I'm so thankful we have that! We've got our credit cards paid off completely and we really don't want to be using them ever again if we can help it! Gary is noticably more relaxed about our financial situation since this has transpired. I'm waiting until we have the first months rent in our account before I get too excited. As we go through this and you hear stories of all the people who wanted the house and the financial difficulties they are presented with I've been just astounded by how uneducated people are about money in our country today. I'm so thankful that it was only a couple years into our marriage that it was explained to us how much of a slave you are to debt. It really does lord over you and consume you- as does every penny you make! So many (us included) have every cent spent before we get it. Where does that kind of thinking come from? When you live paycheck to paycheck it's so hard and then you have society telling you to just take out a loan on a car or that meal out you want or that dress or pair of shoes... put your groceries on the credit card- you get paid next week... but then something happens (it always does!) and before you know it instead of paying that bill off every month you are paying the minimum to get by and you realize that you'll be 50 before it's paid off. I think the thing that hit us the most was that we'll finish paying off our school debt the year before Tyler leaves for college. This first time we realized that we also found that we'd still be paying on our credit cards if we never paid more than the minimum and the ammount it would cost us in intrest was downright sinful. We (I) learned and began to understand the concept of compounding intrest working for and against you. Did I miss the math class where we learned that? Where was I when an expert said that saving a dollar a day would net you hundreds of thousands over time? Where was I when the lesson on paying more than the value of your home in intrest over 30 years was given? And of course (as we DEFINATELY KNOW NOW) your house is only worth what someone will pay for it!!! I was just floored when we learned these things and again, i"m so thankful that we learned them young!!! I'm also (and this is why I share all this) so thankful that I have a husband who is good at helping me remember these things and stick to the goals we've made together. We want to help our kids go to college and we want to be able to retire and not count on others to help us. We want to be debt free and know that we own a house free and clear and the bank can't ever take it away. I don't want to have to sell my furniture and cars and wedding ring to pay back something I should never have borrowed in the first place. Some people will say that any debt is wrong and I"m not sure I'd go that far. Most people at this moment in time could never save up to buy a house in cash- does that mean they shouldn't ever buy? That's up to them but I'm SO thankful we bought within our means or I would be working two jobs right now- one to pay for the house and one to pay for childcare while I worked! Some would say you should never buy anything until you have the cash to buy it. My grandparents lived that way their entire lives and they live well. They are both retired, in thier 80's and travel all over the country. They spend smart but they are able to live comfortably and they have security. They are also able to be generous!! I want that! I want to be able to just randomly buy things for people when I see a need. I know that so many of us have struggles beyond our control and we are honestly doing everything we can to get back in "the right" and have been blessed by the generosity of others. I want to be that generous person because I know that I"m only where I am now out of the generosity of others. We've saved thousands of dollars on gifts of clothes, food, formula, diapers, and toys over the years. I also want Tyler and Grace to know that they won't be paying for our mistakes thier entire lives if something happens to us. So as I sit here, a stay-at-home mom making no dollars for my work, I'm so thankful because in the end the dollars don't matter. I'm raising my own children and you can't put a price on that. The sacrifices are worth it and today when Gary called and said we could go ahead and spend that 55$ on pictures it made me cry- because we have it. Gary works hard and many many unpaid hours for every cent he earns. We both work hard to keep our expenses down and save. We also tithe and I will tell you to my dying day that I believe God has blessed us beyond measure for that one act of obedience. Our sins are enourmous in number but that's one area it's nice to say we've been obedient. Another credit to Gary who makes sure that's the first check we write every month. Many times in the past 7 years the end number on the account didn't give much for groceries and gas but we've never been stranded and we've never gone hungry. We don't always eat things we'd like (ask Gary about PB&J and leftover pot pie nights!) and we hardly ever buy things we'd like but we count ourselves blessed. Hopefully the house (we are still paying on) in Mansfield will be a blessing to these people and the Lord will be glorified. If that's what He has for us then maybe I get to be generous a little early in life. Keep reminding me God knows what he's doing with us because sometimes it SO hard to see it!!! And please pray they pay rent every month! Currently reading : I Love You More: How Everyday Problems Can Strengthen Your Marriage By Dr. Les Parrott III Release date: 01 August, 2005